Shaken..

Deep sigh of relief.

Look around. 

Sigh again.

Thank the Lord for his protection, tender mercy, and grace.

Tuesday evening I had the scare of my life. It's still fresh as ever in my mind.

Valentines day had went very well, Patrick surprised me the day before with the new Twilight movie, then with a card when I woke up and went to get my coffee on Valentines morn. The kids went to school all excited about their exchange, and the candy, oh the candy. *mommy shudder*

After school was typical, Patrick made us dinner so I didn't have to cook. He's such a great man! The kids got ready for bed and Patrick & I settled in on the couch to watch my new movie. 

It had just finished when Missy came down the stairs, about 9:30 or so, saying she couldn't sleep. The night before she had been texting her friends instead of sleeping so I told her to go get me her phone. She came about 3/4 of the way back down the stairs, handed the phone to me and stood there while we talked. Patrick & I were both having a discussion with her when she just stopped talking.

I had glanced away for a second & I hear Patrick scream "MISSY!!", and as I look back up I see her falling face first into the wall in front of her. 

Everything happened so fast. She hit the wall, crumpled to the floor and began to seize. I'm yelling her name, ok, screaming, and was by her side instantly. Pupils dilated, not responding to me in any way. It seemed like forever, but was maybe 30 seconds to a minute. As she came out of the seizure she curled herself into a ball in my lap and just stared at me as Patrick was calling 911.

She still wasn't responding. Her pupils were dilated and non reactive. It wasn't long at all before a county officer arrived, then multiple ems & fire personnel. I sat there holding her head & neck in the position she had curled up into until they were able to c-collar her. She wasn't able to tell me her name, her age, what day it was. The only thing she knew is that I was mommy and Patrick was daddy. 

I don't even know the number of people who were here between the fire department and neighbors. As they prepared her for the backboard I called my mother in law to come, with nothing more than "I need you here, Missy is being taken to the hospital by an ambulance". Not sure if I explained anything more, but it seems like she was here almost instantly. (Thanks Mom).

Many times I've been the EMT or the driver during my 6 years volunteering or in private service. I've even been the patient once. Being on the Mom side, watching it unfold from that perspective, was a completely different, and eye opening experience. I was terrified. She had hit the wall pretty hard, and with the lack of movement, pupils, etc, my biggest fear was she had either broken something in her neck or back, or had a head injury. The numerous things that went through my mind I cannot even begin to describe. I'm thankful, very thankful, for my training. I knew not to let her move until she was collared. I knew what to look for, what to ask, and most importantly that I needed to stay calm for the people coming. Those things came instinctively. The Lord was protecting her, he was also guiding Patrick & I.

We were rushed to the ER and after CT scans, x-rays, bloodwork, and a few other tests, she was cleared of back or head injury & taken off of the backboard. They couldn't pinpoint anything causing the blackout. It was a very slow progression for her pupils to become fully reactive again and for her to begin to move her feet or squeeze with her hands. Each accomplishment made me breathe a little easier. Sometime in the early morning hours she was able to answer our questions again and she was remembering standing on the stairs, getting dizzy and our faces getting blurry. She doesn't remember anything else until she woke up in my arms with me screaming her name and Patrick on the phone with 911. 

We stayed overnight, getting to her room about 4am. They monitored her all day to see if the episode would repeat itself, but it did not and her vitals stayed stable. We were able to come home last night.

We still do not know what caused it and have to follow up with our family doctor, but at least the major things were ruled out.

As I laid in bed last night after tucking her in, I thanked the Lord for protecting her and cried.